14 weeks

I don't have too much of a title for this post as it covers a few topics in my mind. Well, hard things to talk about first I guess. At 12.5 weeks, I was instructed to go to the hospital for some very light bleeding. I thought the doctor would laugh at me for even calling in, but instead, she told me to head to the hospital right away because I have a negative blood type that requires a shot to ensure that I do not build antibodies against the baby. While at the hospital, I had several tests and it was determined that I had what is called placenta previa. Basically, this means that my placenta has attached itself on the lower part of my uterus rather than the upper part. This condition is common early in pregnancy and 90% of the time, it resolves itself. So, my doctor is not at all worried. Also, as a benefit amidst the trial, we got a little snapshot of our sweet baby and he/she was moving ALL around in there and had a very strong heartbeat. However, it called for partial bed rest on my part. It hasn't been the most exciting time for me (Sandra), but God has good plans for it, I know. We have been focused on praying for our sweet baby during this time, who is now the length of a lemon!

On a more happy note, it is our anniversary today (July 5th) and yesterday we were able to spend the day in the Cambria area, enjoying the sun and some delicious food! :) We are so thankful for the marriage that God has provided for us that we have each other during the best seasons as well as the ones of difficulty. We know God has given us charge over this sweet one together and we are anxious always to see how the Lord will build us as a family!

The photos are of our 12.5 week ultrasound, my current baby bump, and the three of us at our anniversary dinner! :)

You are higher (12.5 weeks)

"Hear my cry, O God; Attend to my prayer. From the end of the earth I will cry to You, When my heart is overwhelmed; Lead me to the rock that is higher than I. For You have been a shelter for me, A strong tower from the enemy. I will abide in Your tabernacle forever; I will trust in the shelter of Your wings. Selah" Psalm 61:1-4

I will praise the Lord in all things. Difficult, or easy, I place my trust in HIm who has always been faithful. I will trust in Him during my time of waiting for my sweet child.

Formed (9.5 weeks)

As I pray for my child, I am reminded of how God is forming him/her right now, shaping every little piece of a body that will grow one day into adulthood. What a thought! For, what is now the size of a green olive, will one day be a full grown adult! I could try with all that I have and never be able to fashion something such as what God is creating inside me. I can care all of my cares and worry all there is, but reality is that God loves my little olive more than I ever could!

Psalm 139:13-17 says: "For You formed my inward parts; You covered me in my mother's womb. I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Marvelous are Your works, And that my soul knows very well. My frame was not hidden from You, When I was made in secret, And skillfully wrought in the lowest parts of the earth. Your eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed. And in Your book they all were written, The days fashioned for me, When as yet there were none of them. How precious also are Your thoughts to me, O God! How great is the sum of them!"

Walk by faith (7.5 weeks)

Mark 4:36-41 "Now when they had left the multitude, they took Him along in the boat as He was. And other little boats were also with Him. And a great windstorm arose, and the waves beat into the boat, so that it was already filling. But He was in the stern, asleep on a pillow. And they awoke Him and said to Him, " Teacher, do You not care that we are perishing?" Then He arose and rebuked the wind, and said to the sea, " Peace, be still!" And the wind ceased and there was a great calm. But He said to them, " Why are you so fearful? How is it that you have no faith?" And they feared exceedingly, and said to one another, " Who can this be, that even the wind and the sea obey Him!""

With no visual or physical representation that our baby exists (except for the positive pregnancy tests), I feel as if I am on this boat with Jesus and His disciples. Frequently I ask the Lord: "What is happening? Is all well?" I pour out my anxieties as a new mother for the well-being of my child. As the Lord has continually reminded me in so many areas of my life, He continues to remind me now, that I am to walk by faith. Just before Josh and I began to date, he gave me a call. When I checked my phone to re-assure myself that he really did call, the phone call was not logged. God used this circumstance to show me how I needed to not rely on the physical to determine how I trust. Now that I have a pregnancy without many symptoms, I again have a season to be taught this lesson in a new way. I know my objective: God has told me to dwell on the good things and to be comforted by His presence and peace. He has created my life and He has created my child's.

I am reminded: I am protected and loved by the God that even the wind and sea obey.

Psalm 42

"As the deer pants for the water brooks, so pants my soul for You, O God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God." Psalm 42:1-2

God has presented us yet another opportunity for us to grow close to Him. We are entering into a season marked by cravings, tiredness, lessened ability to think straight, and most of all... patience! Although, its only the beginning, I already thirst fairly constantly. I think that I have been drinking about 20 glasses of water per day! But, as the Lord reminded me this morning, all of this is a reminder of Him. As even I search for the physical water, He is my living water, able to satiate even the deepest of my cravings.